xkcd- Small Talk? So true..

[ibneko]

http://xkcd.com/c222.html

Yeeeah, it happens, quite a bit. It used to happen more when I just got out of high school (where no one bothered with small talk - at least the people I stuck close to anyways? Or if they did, and I gave a honest and complete answer, it didn't feel awkward and they didn't look at me funny) and didn't fully grasp the concept that people ask "what's up/how've you been?", they don't actually want a paragraph of what's actually happening (which I find silly. Why waste breath on a question when you don't actually want an answer worthwhile listening to?).

Apparently a relatively usual answer is "Not much. You?" or "Pretty good. You?" or.. other stuff. And then they reply in the same fashion. At which point, it's usually (unfortunately) my turn to talk again, and, not being capable of pulling random (interesting) things out of my mind, the typical awkward silence ensues while someone tries to find something to say.

Just what do people usually say after the "I'm pretending to be concerned about you, but I don't care about your answer anyways." inquiry? o.O

(Of course, if people actually gave paragraph long responses to the question, there might be more to talk about, at least pertaining to said paragraph long response. So why doesn't anyone do that? Because it sounds like you're self-centered? Or because It's Just Not Done™?)

Ah, there's a delightful answer choice to the small-talk question: "Suicidal." :: snickers::

Comments

[shanrina.livejournal.com]

I have no idea since avoiding and/or screwing up small talk is my forte, but I just have to add my annoyance with people who use it instead of "Hi" when you walk past someone. As someone who doesn't (and probably can't) do small talk anyway, this just confused me for the longest time. I usually just trot out whatever I happen to be thinking at the moment, which has led to some rather bizarre conversations since no matter what I'm doing at any given moment I'm usually thinking about something else. I think long answers may just be Not Done, though.

[trekkie87820.livejournal.com]

ask how classes are going? that usually works for me. usually it goes from there...like ewww chem or bio is awful isn't it...calc must be difficult...yea...and so on

or how their weekend was. and then comment on how the homeworking was not done and blah blah blah. how wonderful and behind everyone is...

i dunno, i'm pretty horrible at small talk. i guess i get pretty boring after a while...usually i just start from there and then go off on tangents. yay

[fbartho.livejournal.com]

I usually go for the "ups and downs" with an adjective indicating what side of things I'm on, good or bad, and gauge people's response to that... then I'll go into an "Tired" with varying descriptive adjectives, and I'll keep gauging their facial/verbal response, and if they still seem genuine then I'll actually go for the paragraph...

It did take some time for me to learn to judge people's responses though, and I still get it wrong sometimes... on the bright side I don't usually talk to people I care about that much, and when I do, I don't feel like sharing, so it's easier to make the neutral response.

[starkravingsane.livejournal.com]

It's not so much "pretending to be concerned" as it is a ritual. People say it in passing because it's rude not to. The actual answer comes much later in the conversation, if you get that far.